"The only way to live fully is to embrace the absurdity of life."
                        - Albert Camus

Existentialism views the existence of the individual person as a free and responsible agent who determines their own development  through acts of the will.

Experience is the vehicle to finding purpose and meaning through engaging with life at many levels: physical, social, personal, and spiritual.

As a female artist of color in a same-sex marriage, I am acutely aware of the emptiness and alone-ness that is the existentialist's dilemma. As I've grown older, that feeling of separation, of loneliness, particularly during the pandemic, has intensified as has my rage.

I've spent many years thinking that the solution was to withdraw and hide thinking that would help me escape feelings of alienation. All it has done was leave me with an emptiness devoid of meaning and purpose. As a result, so many years were wasted seeking something that could not be found in a place, a location, a job, a relationship...because "it" is not a noun, "it" is a verb. 

Descartes indicates that it is action that defines our existence (Cogito ergo sum). It is not that we begin with a self, the "I am" and end with the action, the "I think/reason/feel." No we begin with the verb, the action. It is through this that we get affirmation of our existence. This realization has launched me into engaging with life, sucking the marrow out of whatever years I have left and sharing these existential experiences with you.  Welcome for this time as your road runs next to mine.